Mariah, the Manager”
By Annette Dubrouillet
(as published in Office Pro, June/July 2000)

I’ll never forget the look in Mariah’s eyes when I told her she got the job and would be the new “lead” person on the staff. “I did? That’s fantastic!” she said, smiling ear to ear. I was a new supervisor and Mariah was the first person I’d ever promoted. I’d done some hiring, bringing new people in from the outside, but I had never selected from within. It was exciting – that feeling of being able to acknowledge someone’s potential.

Although this happened over 10 years ago, I remember the scene clearly. I also remember the look of panic and stunned realization later that day as I Mariah and I discussed her new supervisory responsibilities, creating new schedules, distributing work assignments, and performance monitoring. It was as if the wind was taken out of her sails. Although she had read about her responsibilities in the job description and had discussed them in the interview, she was suddenly hit with the full reality of what went along with the new title and increased salary. She was going to have to tell her co-workers what to do, when to do it, and whether they have done it well.

The office consisted of 10 women working in a small organization at a very small Army installation in Germany. Our operating hours were so extensive (almost 100 hours per week), that there was no way that I, the only supervisor, could be on site the entire time. So I was given permission to hire a “leader” for the team. This person wouldn’t have full responsibilities but would serve as supervisor in my absence.

The other staff members’ reactions were mixed. A couple of them weren’t interested in the promotion anyway. More responsibilities meant just that, more responsibilities and they didn’t want them. Several other staff members applied for the position. Their resumes were fairly equal, but the interviews revealed Mariah as the best choice for the job. She was anxious to accept responsibility, she wanted the challenge and she was focused. When asked how she would handle having to supervise the staff, she replied, “Well, I guess I’ll just do it, won’t I?” It was that gut-level strength that got Mariah the job and it would be that same gut-level strength that would get her through the next few months.

Mariah jumped into her position with enthusiasm. She simply began doing what she needed to do. She created and revised schedules, she parceled out work, she criticized and praised fairly. She took to the job like she was born to it. So I was amazed when at the end of several weeks, she came to me and told me she wanted to resign and go back to her regular position. “Things aren’t the way they used to be,” she told me. “Its just not fun anymore.”

Not only was I disappointed that my choice for the position apparently wasn’t working out, but Mariah returning to her old position would mean I would be going back to working 60+ hours a week. I couldn’t let that happen.

I tried to find ways to support Mariah but I was still finding my way through the supervisory maze. I hadn’t been hired from within but was still adjusting to a supervisory position myself. I asked Mariah to please give it several more weeks. Reluctantly she agreed.

As I watched Mariah over the next few days, I began to see the problem more from the perspective of the relationships between the staff and less from the position of what work needed to be done. And she was right; it wasn’t the same old staff anymore. I could see frustration, torn allegiances and resentment. The staff was obviously resisting Mariah on issues and assignments they would normally support. There were rolling eyeballs, shrugs, and mildly sarcastic remarks all over the place. And the more the staff acted that way, the more Mariah would assert her position of authority. She would become stern, rigid and almost rude.

Obviously these interpersonal problems needed more attention than the actual tasks that Mariah needed to perform in her new role. I had enough common sense to know I couldn’t mandate the staff accept Mariah, but I knew we had to do something. In talking over the situation, Mariah and I realized there were two sets of problems here: Mariah needed to be able to cope with her new role and the staff needed to be able to accept Mariah in her new role.

Together, we developed a plan with five principles for making the transition from an equal colleague to a supervisor. The principles went far beyond the simple, common knowledge that once you are a supervisor, you aren’t a colleague anymore. We had to dig deeper.

Principle One: Don’t try to handle this situation by yourself. Find a support system. I worked with Mariah to find a mentor. I knew with my limited supervisory experience, I probably wasn’t that person. I was also too close to the problem to see things clearly. She found another more experienced manager who was very happy to share expertise. She learned that even though her support system could no longer be her former colleagues, it didn’t mean she had to function in a vacuum.

Principle Two: Don’t expect to be perfect. Allow yourself to make mistakes. Even though she was receiving support from another manager, I ensured Mariah that she could turn to me for support. I didn’t expect her to be perfect, and she shouldn’t expect herself to be perfect either. She needed to learn how she was going to handle making mistakes, because she would.

Principle Three: Don’t think you know it all. Continue to learn. I had already seen that as staff began resisting and challenging her, Mariah had become belligerent herself. If they questioned her, she would dig her heels in and let them know she was right. Of course, that backfired on her, because no one is right all the time. She had to learn to admit when she didn’t know something. More importantly she had to learn to let staff know that she was a learner, and when she didn’t know something, she would work to find the answer. She became a role model for continuous learning. Later I would hear staff say that was one of the things they respected most about her.

Principle Four: Don’t expect instant acceptance. Give people time to adjust. Change is hard for everyone. It is especially hard for people in the workplace who may be assigned a new supervisor and have to adjust their work styles to meet the needs of that new person. No wonder people resist change in the workplace. In Mariah’s case, the staff just needed time to get used to the idea of Mariah being a boss and learn that didn’t mean Mariah, herself, had changed. Mariah helped this acceptance process by being herself and being consistent while still getting the job done.

Principle Five: Don’t make a big deal over little stuff. Know what battles to fight. Even after working hard on the other four principles and seeing great changes in the situation, one staff member, Lee Ann, wasn’t coming around. She worked very hard at making Mariah’s life miserable.

Mariah’s mentor had discussed with her the tactic of ignoring irritating behavior. She had been great at doing that with the resistance she had met. She was able to take issues in a light-hearted way that really neutralized the work atmosphere. It gave the staff the time they needed to adjust. But with Lee Ann it was different. Her constant defiance became very obvious and negatively affected the work place. Something had to be done.

Together Mariah and I let Lee Ann know that her behavior wouldn’t be tolerated. Eventually, she quit and went to work in another department. We would have liked her to have adjusted and stayed, but it wasn’t to be.

Mariah had tolerated the minor irritating behaviors the other staff had shown in adjusting to a new supervisor. But in addressing Lee Ann’s chronically negative behavior, the staff saw that Mariah would address the difficult situations. They respected her for knowing the difference between little problems and major impediments and acting when she needed to.

Mariah took advantage of the power the principles gave her and combined them with her desire to perform well and to be an honest, fair person - a combination that always leads to success.

Being promoted from within the organization into a supervisory position brings with it a host of rewards and challenges, and even greater challenges when you supervise former colleagues. Mariah faced them all and came out the winner – so can you.

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